Oscar

Awards shows are a lot like sports. There's intrigue, uncertainty, spontaneity, excitement, favorites, underdogs, mandatory breaks in the action and the potential for memorable bloopers. And come tomorrow morning, there will be loads of second-guessing. The Oscars are the Super Bowl of awards shows. I know from past experience that the awards show viewing experience is enhanced significantly by live-tweeting (2010 Grammy Awards), so tonight I'm going to see how much fun I can have watching the Oscars while live-blogging (a la the 2010 NFL Draft). So without further ado, here we go:

8:00pm EST: I was under the impression, incorrectly so, that the awards show started at 8:00. Guess this means I'll be listening to my sister, roommate and girlfriend discuss who does and does not look good in their dresses for the next half hour.

8:30pm EST: Finally the Oscars have started! Or... well... they will be starting after a 10+minute opening vignette featuring hosts James Franco and Anne Hathaway. It's actually a really well done opening, and yet I do kinda long for the traditional Billy Crystal song and dance routine. Franco and Hathaway are both very likable, and I suspect they'll do a great job...

8:37pm EST: And what have we here? The opening only lasted 7 minutes - good start to an awards show that's likely to last well past midnight.

8:40pm EST: Anne Hathaway is very awkwardly placing her hands on her stomach. My girlfriend can't tell if it's cause she's going to throw up or she doesn't know where to put her arms.

8:45pm EST: The first Oscar of the night is awarded to Alice in Wonderland - for art direction. I really enjoyed this film and thought it went seriously under-appreciated. This is a little ho-hum though - the Oscars should start with a stronger category, like cinematography...

8:46pm EST: It's like Tom Hanks is reading my mind!

8:57pm EST: Bit of an upset win for Melissa Leo as best supporting actress. Nice to see her exceptionally high level of excitement for this, but Kirk Douglas is proving to be a tough act to follow right now.

9:01pm EST: Mila Kunis' dress kinda makes it look like she has matching tattoos on each of her breasts. That's not a bad thing - I'm just pointing it out.

9:13pm EST: If Aaron Sorkin does not win best adapted screen play for the Social Network, I may have to stop watching the Oscars.

9:14pm EST: Ok good.

9:18pm EST: And with the King's Speech's win, the two best movies I saw this year now boast the two best screenplays of the year - fitting.

9:25pm EST: Wow - 55 minute wait for the first Charlie Sheen joke - way to go guy writing for James Franco. What was the over/under?

9:32pm EST: Christian Bale wins best supporting actor - does this mean Batman is going to have a beard in the Dark Knight Rises?

9:42pm EST: Time for best original score - should I be capitalizing the categories? This category will be an interesting referendum on how progressive the Oscars are or are willing to be.

9:43pm EST: Nine Inch Nails just won an Oscar! Great and appropriate win for Trent Reznor, Atticus Ross and the Social Network.

9:45pm EST: Not much love for Scarlett Johansson in our apartment.

10:04pm EST: The Oscars might save some time by not performing each original song nominee. I realize people like singing, but people also like getting to bed before 1:00am.

10:06pm EST: Chuck can sing! Is that in the intersect?!

10:10pm EST: As I'm doing this, I'm realizing that I'm more or less live-tweeting in my blog as opposed to live-blogging - oh well. Also, Anne Hathaway is stealing the show from James Franco - I think it's time to give Jimmy the hook.

10:27pm EST: Billy Crystal should still be hosting this show. His humor is funny, self-deprecating, classy and just right for this event. Anne Hathaway might have some of that in her - her jokes have been forced tonight but there's an endearing awkwardness to the way she does it, a la Crystal. Billy is giving a great tribute/roast to Bob Hope. One of my favorite moments in a slapstick comedy is when Bob Hope plays through Chevy Chase and Dan Akroyd's tent in Spies Like Us. And that was a great transition to introduce the next presenters with Hope.

10:31pm EST: Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law have about as much on-stage chemistry as they had on-screen chemistry in Sherlock Holmes, which is to say very little.

10:35pm EST: If the academy is just going to nominate all of the leading candidates for film of year for the film editing award, what's the point of having separate categories?

10:40pm EST: Just beginning to notice that the Oscars commercials have been far superior to this year's Super Bowl commercials (more or less). They should market this for the future. Just like women have Super Bowl parties to watch the ads, guys could have Oscars parties to watch ads - and knock-out actresses with Henna chest tattoos (thank you Mila Kunis).

10:54pm EST: I'm surprised Leslie Nielsen appeared so early in the dearly departed montage.

10:57pm EST: I've been noticing on twitter that the Oscars are getting trashed pretty hard for lacking personality and feeling this year - in my opinion most of this is James Franco's fault. It's become tragically popular to dis anything and everything on twitter, but I think the botching of the necrology segment demonstrates the criticism vividly. Muting the audience was a horrific mistake, as was not introducing the segment at all. And Halle Berry's tribute of Lena Horn, though sincere, was too brief to be at all impactful.

11:01pm EST: Time for the first of the major categories - best director. It was basically a two horse race that came down to Tom Hooper and David Fincher. While I am a total the Social Network mark, I'm happy to see Tom Hooper win. The King's Speech was a terrific film and was indeed very well directed.

11:10pm EST: Lots of two horse races left - Annette v. Natalie, Colin v. Jesse, the speech v. the stalking tool.

11:11pm EST: Make a wish.

11:16pm EST: As someone who appreciates traditional values, it was very nice to see Natalie Portman's fiance hold her hand and walk her up the steps - strong work. And her acceptance speech is equally endearing.

11:24pm EST: I haven't seen 127 Hours, and none of the clips I've seen tonight have really make me want to either.

11:25pm EST: If Colin Firth starts stammering through his acceptance speech, does the academy consider taking his award back? Seriously though, he was great in the King's Speech and his win, albeit expected, is well deserved.

11:32pm EST: Never would have pegged Anne Hathaway as a "woo-girl" before tonight. I may have to rethink some of the compliments I've given her thus far.

11:33pm EST: Doesn't using the King's Speech to introduce the other movies nominated for best picture kinda give away the result?

11:36pm EST: And here's the answer to my previous question - yes it does.

Well, it is way past bedtime for the students of PS22 from Staten Island, NY, and it's nearing mine, but I'm shocked the Oscars concluded before midnight. While I can appreciate the attempt at brevity, I think what was sacrificed was perhaps the personality and emotion that tonight's telecast lacked. Still, I was happy to see so many deserving winners - makes sense given that it's an odd year (seriously, look back at the last two decades of Oscars - good films get screwed in even years) - and enjoyed the experience of blogging my way through the show. Likewise, hopefully you enjoyed reliving the experience through my words.